THIS JOKE IS MY FRIENDS TOLD MI ONE....


This guy goes to a super market and goes to isle 12 and asks for a box of condoms. The lady askes "what size" and the guy says "I don't know" so the lady askes him to pull down his pants. The lady tugs a few times and says "you need a box of x-large condoms". So this guy hears behind him and he asks for a box of condom's, and the lady says "what size" and the guy says I don't know. So the lady asks him to pull down his pants. The lady tugs a few time and says "get a box of medium condoms" So this teenager in isle 11 hears and wants some of the action. So he goes to isle 12 and asks "can I have a box of condoms" The lady asks "what size" and the teenage says "I don't know" So the lady asks him to pull down his pants . When he does, the lady tugs a few times, stands up and announces "Clean up in isle 12"

One stormy night an English, Irish and Scottish man were walking home and had no shelter so at the top of this big hill they found this haunted house. They were all freaked out and hesitated to go in. Eventually, the English man went in and found a five pound note sitting on the table and he goes to lift it when all of a sudden the ghost of Mickey Mouse appears and says "I'm the ghost of Mickey Mouse lift that fiver and I'll haunt your house" Next the Scottish man went in and saw the fiver, but before he could lift it the ghost of Mickey Mouse appeared again and said "I'm the ghost of Mickey Mouse lift that fiver and I'll haunt your house". Finally, the Irishman went in and lifted the fiver and Mickey Mouse popped out again and said "I'm the ghost of Mickey mouse lift that fiver and I'll haunt your house" Then the Irishman said "I'm the ghost of Donald Duck I'll lift this fiver and I'll run like fuck"

Three men went to hell.

The devil said to them "You have come to hell, and you must now choose whether to spend eternity in room 1, 2 or 3"

He then opened the doors to the three rooms.

Room 1 was filled with men standing on their heads, on a hard wooden floor.

Room 2 was filled with men standing on the heads, on a cement floor.

Finally, room 3 had just a few men, standing in shit up to their knees and drinking coffee.

The men thought for a while, and decided to go with room 3, as it was less crowded and they could drink coffee.

They entered the door to room 3 and just as it was closing behind them, the devil said "OK men, coffee break's over. Back on your heads."

The Penis requests a promotion and a raise for the following reasons:

Has to work hard
Has to work at great depths
Has to work upside down
Has no ventilation or air conditioned environment at work
Has to work in a high humidity environment
Has to work at high temperatures
Does not get weekends and holidays off
Does not get time off after extra hours of work
Has a hazardous work environment that often causes professional sickness

Request denied for the following reasons:

Does not work 8 hours in a row
Does not answer immediately to all requests
After a short activity period, falls asleep at work
Shows no fidelity to the workplace
Retires too early
Does not work at all unless pushed from behind
Does not leave the workplace clean after finishing work
Sometimes leaves work, too early

yes!!! vietnam win the semi-final,... wahahaha
luckly i support vietnam.... my father also support vietnam and win some money..... haha... before posting... wqent to the boring tution... having no reason...take up Amath lesson... wa sianzx quite boring ther onli silent cannot talk... freak up siall......somemore..cc go ther support singapore wat the noob shit.. so pathetic lazy to post byebye..^^

yeah man... going to watch singapore VS vietnam this sunday..!!! wif my uncle siol...
sunday coming soon yeah going ther wif blue color shirt... supporting vietnam hahas singapore betrayer here^^..... anyone going ther?... maybe can hav a meet up.. hahas bye^^

sorry ah no story but onli boring quiz...


1. What Have You Been Doing Recently?:
busy attending classes
2. Do You Ever Turn Your Cell Phone Off?:
its lyk duh!
3. What Happened At 10am Today?:
i guess i just woke up
4. When Did You Last Cry?:
stm cant rmb
5. Believe In Fate/Destiny?:
sometimes
6. What Do You Want In Your Life Now?:
my desires
7. Do You Tend To Make Relationship Complicated?:
well, i hope i dont
8. Are You Wearing Anything You Borrow From Someone?:
PLEASE! i cannot buy myself arh
9. What Was The Last Movie You Caught?:
madagascar (i guess)
10. Does That Person Know You Like Him/Her?:
yes or no, i dunno
11. Who Always Make Me Laugh?:
no people....on bothers
12. Do You Speak Languages Other Than English?:
why not?
13. Favourite Website(s)?:
any website tat is abnormal
14. What Are You Doing Tomorrow?:
i dun have power! cannot predict the future
15. What Do You Think You Are Like?
: i hope im normal
16. Who Will You Choose To Die With?
: it isnt my choice
17. Where Have You Been Today?
: early in the morning of course at home la, i said i just wake up.
18. What Game Do You Play Often?:
all game..
19. Who Are You Missing Right Now?:
ask me must tell you??
20. If You Have To Choose A Friend And Love, Who Will You Choose?:
both, i dun tink i have to choose
21. What Are You Doing Now?:
answering the quiz la
22. Which Primary School Are You From?:
xinghua primary
23. Name Three Colour That You Like.:
white, pink, black
24. What Emoticon Do You Like To Show?
:D
25. What Is Life To You?:
smth i appreciate a lot
26. If You Have Something Troubling You, What Will You Do?:
vent it out
27. Who Did You Last Chat With On MsN Today?:
dunno not sure?
28. Who Do You Admire The Most?:
eugene and shuying...i hope i and yanling also can like tat..i dunno
29. Which Month Were You Born In?:
im a july baby
30. How Are You Feeling Right Now?
: im rushing out
31. What Is The Time Now?
4.13am
32. What Kind Of Person Do You Think The One Who Tag You Is?:
nice person
33. What Colour Do You Use To Dye Your Hair?:
rainbow color maybe? why not?
34. Why Are You Doing This Test?
: cause i cant back out from this
35. What Do You Do When Your Moody?:
thinking happy thingss
36. At Which Stage Do You Wish To Get Married?
: when it comes i will at most 20++ less than 25 coz i dun wan to get old when my child is still studying...
37. Who Is More Important To You?
: everybody who cares for me
38. If Today Is The Last Day Of Your Life, What Will You Do?:
take a last look at everything
39. Who Is/Are The People/Person You Trust The Most?:
many la
40. Do You Believe In Seeing The Rainbow After The Rain?:
it is true la, scientifically proven
41. If You Have A Dream To Come True, What Would It Be?:
i guess is to excel in my studies
42. What Is Your Goal For This Year?:
this year is coming to an end
43. Do You Believe In Eternity Love?:
i will
44. What Feeling Do You Love Most?
: feeling being loved
45. Do You Really Think It's Global Warming Now?
: it is okay
46. What Feeling You Hate The Most?
: seeing my frens n family get sad & tere is nth i can do
47. Do You Like Doing Quizzes?:
maybe
48. Do You Believe In Gods?:
ya sometimes
49. Who Cares For You The Most?:
my family and my brothers
50. What Do You Think Is The Most Important Thing In Your Life?
: for now is my studies, having joy..and happiness dun regret when u are old..
51. What Will You Bring When You Fight?
: when a bloody bastard keep irritate mi
52. What Have You Regretted Doing In Your Whole Life?:
well many things
53. What Do You Do If Nobody Cared For You Any Longer?
: die
54. What Will You Do If Your Boyfriend/Girlfriend Two-Timed You?:
4get bout him, no point goin on longer
55. How Do You Feel Now?:
wacking my com


stupid quiz waste my time!!

A family trees story start now...

dear readers, today story will be about the day at pasa malam...

yanling--(police woman)

Ong cheng chuen--(fish balls seller)
Mrs regina ong--(fish ball seller wife)

kaiwei--(gamer seller)

agene--(1st brother)
weineng--(2nd brother)
cheechin--(3rd brother)
nelson--(4th brother)

Eugene quek--(father of 4)
Mrs shuying quek--(mother of 4)

jovan neo--(hotdog and sasuage seller)
Mrs berina neo--(hotdog and sasuage seller wife)

Once a time the family quek went to the nearby pasa malam to have a look...
soon they reached a stall tat play a game...

eugene--how much madam?
kaiwei--why should u noe?
eugene--my children play lar!
kaiwei--ask them go home lar..!!
eugene--wat kind of attitude is this?
kaiwei--wa kaozx is i should i u wat wrong wif u?
eugene--i got any problem?
kaiwei--ya lar!
eugene--? wat problem?
kaiwei--u dunno ah?
eugene--u did not tel mi how i noe?
kaiwei--u ask mi how much?
eugene--ya la then?
kaiwei--u ask mi how much u think i prositute ah?
eugene--o chey i ask u how much the game lar!!
kaiwei--o ask propley lar!
eugene--so madam how much is the game?
kaiwei--20bucks per round... sir
mrs shuying quek--u tink daylight robber ah?
kaiwei--o sry this lady now is at night..pasa malam onli open during at night la so u must say nightlight robber...
shuying--nightlight robber ah?
kaiwei--great dog..^^
shuying--=.=

shuying--dear better dun get scam
eugene--nvm lar kid wanna play let them play lar... i got money$$$
shuying--dun overspend
eugene--ya lar u veri nosey sia
shuying--then i stup up lor
eugene--tat right^^


agene--daddy the game veri nice leh i play over 10 times le
shuying--wat!!?!!
agene--daddy give mi the money de
shuying--u noe per game how much?not?
agene--2buck
shuying--how come so cheap?
agene--becoz the aunty say tat eugene daddy veri handsome so he gave us discount but not u
shuying--i am too big to play =.=

jovan--money come..
eugene--whu u talking to?
cheechin--u lar
eugene--how darn u talk to ur lim bei lky tat!!!
cheechin--why cant?
eugene--go hm u get it from mi
cheechin--bring it on man..^^


after playing the game ...quek children get hungry...

weineng--daddy i am hungry...
eugene-- u this fat pig eat eat eat
weineng--i fit ok?
eugene--look in the mirror...
weineng--i look le...
eugene--so wat the answer?
weineng--i am fit^^
nelson--daddy i also hungry...
weineng--daddy see he also hungry so u cant say mi fat u asshole
nelson--daddy we go eat hotdog can?
eugene--can...


soon they reach the stall tat sell hotdogs...

weineng--daddy order 20 sasuage plz..
eugene--uncle how much ah?
eugene--i mean the sasuage how much for one?
jovan neo--5 buck pre sticks..
shuying--siao so exp..
mrs neo--as u noe the price everything go up...
shuying--i noe u ned to go up so high meh?
mrs neo--ya lar this is how to do buiness ma,,,
shuying--u go die lar.. up so high confirm no ppl wanna buy..

eugene pass the 20bucks to the owner..

mrs neo--see i told u got ppl wanna buy de..
shuying--dear why u buy?
eugene--they wan ma..
shuying--when u become so kind?
eugene--yesterday
shuying--=.=

weineng--daddy i thought order 20 why each person one onli?
eugene--u are fat stop eating...
weineng--let mi tel u one last itme i am fit not fat!!!! understood?!@!!!!!!!!!!!@!@!@!@!!!!!!!!
eugene--y...e....s..
weineng--great dog daddy
eugene--=.=

soon they walk and walk suddenly they heard a sound...

chenchuen--lelong lelong selling 2buck pre stick.......lelong lelong selling 2buck pre stick......
cheechin--daddy i wn leh
agene-- i also wan
weineng--i also wan
nelson--i also wan
eugene--okok all take....

all together the 4 children took 50 sticks
this is wat happen when eugene daddy paying money

eugene--fishball aunty how much the fish ball?
Mrs regina ong---erm...300 bucks plz,..
eugene--i thought 2 bucks pre stick so total is 100bucks ma aunty..
shuying--aunty u got mentally problem or u fail math de?
mrs ong--u all wrong,,,.i see u all not happy..
eugene--kbkp knn children all chiong lar,!!!
agene--brothers stop eating chiong ah.!!!!!!

the fight started the fishball fly from the corner of the pasa malam to the end of the pasa malam....when eugene going to take the chopper....

beep bo beep bo..
eugene--all get out ma ta(police) come already!!!
agene--brother all chiong go bak hm...
yanling--stop wher u are u are not going anywher..
eugene--siao la my future gone sia
shuying--same lar mine also,,,
eugene--police give face lar...
yanling--u think i veri relax de ah?
eugene--ya lor...u today wher the police suit veri sexy siol....espicially figure
yanling--u take mi as positite ah?
eugene--no la juz praising u sia....
yanling--no take back ur words...
yanling--police take them all back to jail...let them suffer inside...
eugene--sorry lar....
yanling--no more words bring them in....
police--yes madam..
eugene-- no choice la... go then go lar got free food.. free room.. free wall..free shirts...everything free... should be happy...
shuying--already happy =.=
4 brothers--nvm lar let us taste the feeling of jail^^



this story ends here...^^ hope u have a nice day at jail thankyou^^

Labels: doing a crime is ruining ur future

here come the FAMILY TREES

Early morning wake up.... here it goes....

shuying--(oi my dear sons and daughter wake up le it is morning hubby eugene it morning)
agene---(yawn..coming)
berina--(wait lar kp so much)
cheechin---(5 more min)
weineng---(ya i am ready lar pa jiao)

shuying mama is still at the kitchen preparing breakfast for them
soon the sons and daughter are at the table waiting

berina---(mama ready or not i veri hungry la)
shuying---(wait lor.. it coming..)

we brothers stare at the kitchen waiting for breakfast..soon it came..

eugene---(sons and daughter i today wanna bring u all go beach!!!
agene---(tat great)
cheechin---(ok then)
weineng---(anything lar)

grasshopper---(i also wan go leh)
eugene---(cannot lar u too tiny veri diffucult take care u siol..
grasshopper---(u tink u big meh?)
eugene---(tat is wat i tink now..)

soon after breakfast they went to the beach...the sons bring their GF BF ther also...

cheechin---(wow! today the beach look so nice hor?)
kaiwei---(ya lor..)

jovan---(dear...u today look veri sexy seh)
berina---(wa biang u mean other day i not sexy ah?)
jovan---(erm.. no lar juz kidding onli today veriveri sexy onli...)
berina---(o yeah...? tat my good dog...)
jovan---(=.=)

agene---(baobei u like here ma?)
regine---(of coz lar u asking nosence seh)
agene---(no lar i onli asking)
regine---(o ok.. )

weineng---(marvallous.... today the beach got so many pretty lady siol)
yanling---(u mean i not pretty ah?)
weineng---(no lar i mean they pretty but u prettier lar..^^)
yanling---(tat better)
weineng---(=.=)

shuying---(hubby wher should we pinic?)
eugene---(stupit lar u..!! of coz under the tree lar)
shuying---(=.=)

soon they found a place at sat at ther they take the volleyball and play...

weineng---(darling u wan to play ma?)
yanling---(no lar i scared of sun..)
weineng---(nvm lar i help u bring sunblock le..)
yanling---(ok lor...)


jovan---(dear.. u can wear bikini and play bo?)
berina---(u say leh?)
jovan---(can la)
berina---(u wait la wait long long)

cheechin---(baby..u today why look so tired?)
kaiwei---(got meh?)
cheechin---(have lar!)
kaiwei---(how u know?)
cheechin---(i got fate in u of coz i noe lar so u wanna play?)
kaiwei---(ok lor...)

agene---(dear u wanna play?)
regine---(u play i play lor...)
agene---(ok let go)

soon before the game started...sometihing happen...

weineng---(why u wearing T-shirt?)
yanling---(a bull then naked ah?)
weineng---(bikini lar)
yanling---(cannot lar ltr milk dripped out^^)
weineng---(=.= ok nvm)

THE GAME STARTED
AFTER THE GAME ALL HIDE UNDER THE SHADE..

berina---(dear i am hungry i want to eat food leh..)
jovan---(take la it is juz infront of u)
berina---(can feed mi?)
jovan---(u no hands ah?)
berna---(>.<)

after tat nelson and yuki come...

nelson---(hey brother!!)
agene--(u come already ah? why so long?)
nelson---(traffic jam lar)
agene---(complaint lar...!!!)
nelson---(u tink ur father own de ah?)


yuki---(nel...)
nelson---(wat?)
yuki---(u today veri handsome)
nelson---(serious bo?)
yuki---(serious lar!!)
nelson---(but u today dun lok sexy...)
yuki---(=.=)


alyssa---(ma'ma)
shuying---(wat?)
alyssa---(u wan to eat?)
shuying---(of coz lar u cannot hear my ear munmbling ah?)
alyssa---(cannot ur stomach too small...)
shuying---(u darm stupit and dumb leh!!!)
alyssa---(ma'ma tat is wat u told mi everyday)
shuying---(=.=)
eugene---(dun angry lar)
shuying---(wa lao she so stupit teach also dunno)
eugene---(send her bak la!!!)
shuying---(wher?)
eugene---(phillipine lar... u tink go hm ah?)
shuying---(ok then)
alyssa---(ma'ma dun lar...)
shuying---(too bad...)




the sory end here!!! happy holi's and have a nice day^^

plz i offence someone plz.. tel mi...

FAMILY TREE
-father(eugene)
-Mother(shuying)
-Sister(berina)
-Sister's husband(jovan)
-3 Brothers(1st agene, 3rd nelson, 4th cheechin)
-myself(2nd weineng)
-1st brother GF(regine)
-2nd myself GF(yanling)
-3rd brother GF(yuki)
-4th brother GF(kaiwei)
-Maid(alyssa)


-our house pet...
....yeu jiunn(hippo)
....yu cong(rabbit)
....zhichao(grasshopper)


THIS IS A FAMILY TREE
IT CONSIST NOT ONLY PEOPLE BUT
ALSO HAPPINESS, SADNESS, EMOTIONAL....


LOL

From jocelyn, can see she is very bored
. LOL1.List 5 people whom you want to do this quiz
YANLING AGENE CHEECHIN BERINA SHUYING KAIWEI
:D2.Your name
WEINENG
3.Your age under
18.
4.Attached/Single
single
5.Five(+1) of your close friends agene eugene cheechin nelson jovan berina yanling shuying and kaiwei.
6.Your 2 favourite colours pink and Black.7.Storybook or comic
none.
8.Do you have a crush
guess so?
9.Has an unknown person asked you for your number before?
nope.
10.If yes, did you give your number to the person who asked?
-
12.Name 2 guy friends that you are close to
agene and eugene
13.Do you play online games
sort of
14.Do you play MapleStory
sometime private de.
15.Do you play Audition
used to
.16.Favourite number
888
7.Favourite alphabet
A(hope to get A for exam oso >.<)
18.Hotmail add
O.o
19.Would you rather go out with your stead or your brothers?(friends?)
both ? most time brothers.. no friends
20.Do you trust your stead?
dunno. ._.
21.Money or brothers
both
22.Stead or brothers
both
23.Anime or drama?
drama
24.Best girl-friend
to be no best girl.. de boy and girl no one call best girl
:D25.Best guy-friend
myself

i juz came bak from camping from sch 3d2n

1stday
we reach sch 8.00am and fall in in the parade square
we have games for 1st day ice breaking.. it is to noe more friends and have a good relationship with them and communicate wif them too^^
after tat we had a game water game.. there is 3 water games... 2rd the boming game we are given plastic filled wif water and shoot at each other and 2nd game we must squeez we water from our shirt tat the sir pour on us 3nd game we claw under the rope wif the mud on the ground.. pathetix man,... untill PE shirts all turn brown...
after tat we go and have a shower 1hrs shower tat sir has given us....
went to the canteen toilet and wash it up....
after washing it is time for dinner.... we have a packet of rice yummy yummy...>.<
and we ate it after finishing the cheering songs ....makan,...!!!!!!
then after dinner we were arrange to groups.... and 1 2 3 i was the 3 ....
we were preparing the cam fire tmr...nght and we have drills... and campcraft and tis went off first day....


2nd day
we wake up 6.00am veri early siol....we report in and after tat we are having MOI test and drills test... OMG>>>!!!! guess wat? i failed sia... pathetic...
but nvm i knew i will failed soon

then we have survie cooking i parnter wif weihao
then after tat we have lecture.... and TEST!!!! i pass tis time^^
then we preparing for campfire tonight!! we were arranged by groups...
we will be acting skit
and soon we........ act at night


3rd day
nothing have breakfast... clean up the toilet room and lot more tiring.... reach hm immediately slp.. lols... it is bored... rite now i gonna slp good nite baby^^

wow!! today is a wonderful day
we went to the wild wild wet to play.... before tat we meet at the hougang interchange... i meet at agene hus first..
after tat we went to hugang mall to take bus to downtown east for www... yanling cannot make it so is not free as for her thailand thingy tat is so wasted lor...
we pay for total 224 bucks for the www... d we went in and play we... find a locker and we place all the belonging inside the locker...
we play for so long and lastly.. we play the purplr thing ycall lala land tat was scary siol i was urine tat time at the seated place pee and weeee weeeee off it went wow inside freaking dark make my fell so empty...

after playplay for so long we went to lan and pool and off the hm we g0....